On Questioning Fictionkin Identity With An OC

February 5th, 2025

In all the time that I’ve been in the alterhuman community, there’s never been any question for me about whether or not I was fictionkin. I’ve had characters I’ve liked, characters I’ve crushed on, cosplayed, etc., but I never once really looked at a character and felt this deep connection with them as if they were me. The closest connection I’ve felt with a character not my own in recent years is Alastor from Hazbin Hotel. I love his attitude (“you’re never fully dressed without a smile.”) his radio voice, how absolutely sinister he is, and the way he can stretch and contort his own limbs, grow sharper claws and teeth for a more monstrous appearance, gives me species envy. But at the end of the day, can I really say that Alastor is me? Do I honestly feel a deep connection to him in that way? I can’t exactly say I do.

I tend to find solace in my own characters vs other peoples. I, as a nonbinary person, among other things, don’t feel represented by most of them, so it’s no wonder I tend to gravitate towards ocs. One of the benefits of original characters is that any identity you give them is canon. I need nonbinary f/os and so I have canonical ones, no need to worry about pitiful headcanons which will never truly give me what I want and need.

Do you ever have that moment where you give a character certain traits, and later on, realize that these are things about yourself that you hadn’t yet figured out? Around 2019 - 2020, I created this one particular character who we’ll call A. A was a changeling living in a time period I had a deep connection to, but didn’t quite understand at the time. I had had changeling characters before them (can’t imagine why the idea appealed to me) but this was after I’d come out to myself as a fairy. In short, A was truly everything I wished I could be and something I wanted to aspire to.

Now, I’ll begin to discuss having A as a potential fictionkin identity. Most of the fictionkin community, at least from what I’ve seen, explains their fictionkinity by virtue of past lives, and truly, I don’t believe I was this character in a past life (even if I may have been somewhat similar.) This character came from my brain, but was created from concepts I resonated with, and wasn’t aware of the time. Sometimes, I like to think of A as myself from the future in a way. A future self that I try to aspire towards.

Maybe calling myself fictionkin of this character can just be another way for me to connect with them, even if I’m looking more towards my future than any past life.